As a football coach, I've had so many good and unforgettable memories with the teams I handled and the players I coached, but of course, there are bad moments, too. There is actually one particular moment that I can never forget, and it's when Ken, one of my most promising players told me this - "I don't think I can do this anymore coach... I don't want to play anymore."
Instead of forcing him to come back to the team and play again, I decided to find out why felt that way about the sport I knew he really loved. Could it be burnout? Did he find another interest? Was I too hard on him? Well, it turned out that none of these was the reason. Rather, it was his parents.
His parents were too involved in his game. His dad, in particular, couldn't stop coaching him and telling him what he should and shouldn't do to win a game. Almost all conversations they have at home was centered on how Ken could become a better player. These all became too much for him to handle...
How supportive should parents be to their child's sport?
There was actually never a single game that I didn't see Ken's parents watching him play. I even wished that all my players' parents were just like Ken's because I knew how important it is for young athletes to feel the love and support of their parents. But the question is "to what extent of being supportive should parents be to their kid's sport?"
As a coach and a parent, I think what's important is that we love our kids in a helpful way. We should be their source of inspiration and not a reason for them to walk away from sports.
Why do kids give up sports?
Here's what kids usually say as the reason they want to drop out from their sport:
"It's not fun anymore."
The more kids enjoy themselves playing, the harder they will work and the better they'll perform. You've got to understand that it has to be fun for your child, so when you feel your child isn't enjoying it anymore, find a way to make it fun for them again.
"I'm not good at this."
Why don't kids get fed up playing video games for hours? Well, it could be because nobody's telling them how to play the game. Sure, you want your child to be good at his sport, but this doesn't mean you should dictate how he or she should play the game. There's nothing wrong with coaching a child, but remember that good coaching doesn't rob athletes of freedom or autonomy.
"I don't like losing."
As parents, it's our job to make our kids understand that sports isn't all about winning. We have to make them realize and believe that in life, they can't always win, and life is a lot like sports...You win some, you lose some. When a child is confident that he's good enough in his parents whether he wins or not, he's likely to still find hope and passion in the face of defeat... And this is a life lesson we all want our children to learn.
No comments:
Post a Comment